Holy crap - that's how high the snow is?!? How high is the window?Quote:
Originally Posted by Crazybob
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Holy crap - that's how high the snow is?!? How high is the window?Quote:
Originally Posted by Crazybob
Granted, the building is a little recessed into the ground there, but the snow was about 4 feet.
http://i86.photobucket.com/albums/k9...SSCOWHTTT4.jpg
http://i86.photobucket.com/albums/k9...SSCOWHTTT5.jpg
http://i86.photobucket.com/albums/k9...SSCOWHTTT3.jpg
Poor zombie67. He's led such a tough life...
http://www.lamebook.com/wp-content/u...11/undead1.png
A tough looking group of bikers were riding when they saw a girl about to jump off a bridge so they stop.
The leader, a big burly man, gets off his bike and says, "What are you doing?"
"I'm going to commit suicide," she says.
While he did not want to appear insensitive, he didn't want to miss an opportunity he asked "Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a Kiss?"
So, she does and it was a long, deep lingering kiss.
After she's finished, the biker says, "Wow! That was the best Kiss I have ever had. That's a real talent you are wasting. You could be famous
Why are you committing suicide?"
"My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl......"
OH SNAP!!!! =))Quote:
Originally Posted by c303a
If my son had done that to me, I would have laughed my friggin arse off. Looks like Mike's mom is a prime candidate for PROZAC. :PQuote:
Originally Posted by Maxwell
I'd kill him first then laugh my arse off!
So, these guys are hilarious. I absolutely love them. Here are two of my favorite videos of theirs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bhcA4Ry65FU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fad6eZTDikA&feature=youtube_gdata
The sharing of marriage....
Grandpa Ole, up dere in da u.p, placed an order for one hamburger, French fries and a drink.
He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one half in front of his wife, Lena ..
He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife.
He took a sip of the drink, then Lena took a sip and then set the cup down between them . As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people around them were looking over and whispering.
Obviously they were thinking, 'That poor old couple - all they can afford is one meal for the two of them.'
As grandpa Ole began to eat his fries a young man came to the table and politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple. The old man said, they were just fine - they were used to sharing everything.
People closer to the table noticed the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite. She sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink.
Again, the young man came over and begged them to let him buy another meal for them. This time the old woman said 'No, thank you, we are used to sharing everything.'
Finally, as Grandpa Ole finished and was wiping his face neatly with the napkin, the young man again came over to the little old lady who had yet to eat a single bite of food and asked 'What is it you are waiting for?'
She answered
'DA TEETH.'
Very Important
With all of the severe weather we have been having this winter, the
Department of Transportation issued a travel warning. They suggest that
anyone traveling in the current icy conditions should have the
following:
Shovel
Blankets or sleeping bag
Extra clothing including coats, hats and gloves
24 hours worth of food
De-icer
Rock salt
Flashlight and spare batteries
Road flares or reflective triangles
Empty gas can
Booster cables
I looked like an idiot on the bus this morning.
Senior Snowplow
[/url]http://i251.photobucket.com/albums/g...mentaspx-1.jpg
Oh my god this was fantastic.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQRMvg5TAl8&feature=player_embedded
Valentine's Day!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FcspYEOo1I
That is funny for multiple reasons, not the least of which is that I was rejected by eHarmony. Oh, and I call Pamela - dibs.Quote:
Originally Posted by zombie67
OMG! .... :p
That's a great site.:D
One more Viking's joke
While the Pope is on vacation, visiting the rugged beauty of Alaska, he hears a frantic commotion just at the edge of the woods of his cabin.
He proceeds to investigate the noise, and happens upon a helpless Minnesota Vikings fan wearing shorts, sandals, a 'Go Vikes Go' hat and a 'Vikings rule' shirt. The Vikings fan was screaming and struggling mightily, trying to free himself from the grasp of a 10-foot grizzly bear.
As the Pope watched the struggle in horror, a group of Green Bay Packers fans wearing 'Super Bowl' shirts came racing up. One quickly fired several .44 magnum slugs right into the bear's chest, narrowly missing the Viking's fan. Two other Packers fans pulled the semiconscious Viking fan from the bear's grasp. Using baseball bats from behind the seats of their pickup truck, the three Packer fans efficiently finished off the grizzly like it was a Pittsburg Steeler. Two of the men dragged the dead grizzly onto the bed of their pickup truck, while the other tenderly placed the injured Vikings fan in the back seat.
As they began to leave the scene, the Pope summoned all of the men over to him, and proudly proclaimed, "I give you my blessings for your brave and selfless actions! I have forever heard of bitter hatred between Packers fans and Vikings fans. I have now seen with my own eyes that this is not true."
As the Pope returned to his cabin, one Packer's fan asked his buddies, "Hey, who the heck was THAT guy?"
"Are you kidding? That was the Pope," another replied. "He's in direct contact with Heaven and has access to all wisdom."
"Well," said the Packer fan, "he may have access to all wisdom, but he doesn't know squat about bear hunting! By the way, is the bait still alive, or do we need to go back to Minnesota and get another one?"
I'm making my daughters watch this...a lot.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-Xx8LlpGog&feature=player_embedded
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-Xx8...layer_embedded.
Shouldn't that be required viewing in high schools? :-bdQuote:
Originally Posted by NJCaNS
Im probably the only one who finds this amusing... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ynb20P898k
No - that's pretty awesome, actually...Quote:
Originally Posted by joker
Good Ones!
Dude! That was totally RAD!!Quote:
Originally Posted by joker
BTW: I know I'm older than many here. Proof? I watched Star Trek (TOS) during its first airing on TV. That was 1966~1969... And I never missed a broadcast!!
Trivia: (Without Cheating) What is the name of Star Trek's original Production company?
Extra Points: Who were the owners of that company?
That was pretty funny gonna do some link forwarding :)
Desilu studios named after Desi Arnez and Lucille Ball if I remember right. In the last season Gene Roddenberry (smelling the writing on the wall) started introducing things like the Vulcan medal of honor so there would be more merchandise to sell.
I'll just say this: I'm not surprised that YOU find that amusing. :DQuote:
Originally Posted by joker
You have good taste - I love Steven Lynch! And that is not even one of his better ones I've seen of his. He's got a couple Comedy Central specials which are epic...Quote:
Originally Posted by joker
This one plays multiple videos in a row: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKZJM...aVlkRXBkLOsD2K
Brilliant. I love him...Quote:
Originally Posted by joker
Touche! Give that man a cookie :)Quote:
Originally Posted by -GER-
A blonde goes ice fishing
A blonde wanted to go ice fishing. She'd seen many books on the subject, and finally, after getting all the necessary "tools" together, she made for the nearest frozen lake. After positioning her comfy footstool, she started to make a circular cut in the ice.
Suddenly---from the sky---a voice boomed, "THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!"
Startled, the blonde moved further down the ice, poured a Thermos of cappuccino,and began to cut yet another hole.
Again, from the heavens, the voice bellowed, "THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!"
The Blonde, now quite worried, moved way down to the opposite end of the ice, set up her stool, and tried again to cut her hole.
The voice came once more. "THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!"
She stopped, looked skyward, and said, "Is that you, Lord?"
The voice replied, "NO, THIS IS THE MANAGER OF THE ICE RINK."
I love Mitch Hedberg. If you're ever in need of a fix, check out the Mitch Hedberg Quote Generator.Quote:
Originally Posted by joker
These are actual comments made by South Carolina Troopers that were taken off their car videos:
1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one
you just went through."
2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while."
3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document." (My Favorite)
4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."
5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you." (LOVE IT)
6. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"
7. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"
8. "Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."
9. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"
10. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop."
11. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."
12. "In God we trust; all others we run through NCIC."
( National Crime Information Center )
13. "Just how big were those 'two beers' you say you had?"
14. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can."
15. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."
AND THE WINNER IS....
16. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here."
=))=))=)).....