Also, FUCK YOU King George!

Did that get your attention? Wanna know why? Read the Declaration of Independence. Oh sure, everyone knows the thrilling first bits, like the preamble. That's fun to read, short, and makes us feel good.

But I am talking about the actual REASONS, which are detailed in the indictment section. 27 specific reasons. And they end with this ball breaker:

"In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people."

In summary: Our holiday should be less "Happy 4th!" and more "Death to tyrants!" or "Never Forget!" or "Watch what you do Mr. President. Because we are watching for sure...very closely." Well, that last one one is too damn wordy. But you get the idea.